Waves

There is a quote I heard years ago that someone made reference to when I was a stay home parent. The quote was, “The days are long, but the years are short”. This quote applies to parenting and is especially true for parents who are staying home with their kids for COVID-19. It’s been four weeks since my family and I started our home bound journey. I call it a journey because I don’t really know what else to call it.

Like thousands of others, my family and I have settled into a home routine. We work and school from home, cook, clean, and get outdoors for at least an hour a day. We don’t have a lot of variety to our days, except on the weekends we don’t do school or homework. Our days seem long and predicable.

I’ve been grappling with emotions during this journey, which appear to come in waves. I don’t feel emotional all the time, but when I do it seems to hit hard and fast, like a huge wave crashing to the shore. I started to think of my emotions as waves last week because I realized there was little I could do to stop them. They come and go at will, and I must wait until the feeling passes and try to regroup afterwards.

Freedom to do as I want, when I want, has been the hardest challenge for me. Not being able to head to the park for a walk or grab a meal a local restaurant feels punitive. I didn’t realize how important being able to do things of my own will were. Having options is important to me. I like change. I like variety. I like making the day up as I go along, rather than having it pre-planned each day. It makes me happier.

I struggle with feelings of boredom (doing the same thing everyday), irritation (compromising with the family on things I want to do, but they don’t) and guilt (feeling like I should be more productive and not complaining). All of these feelings are normal and to be expected. But, I’m not used to having the intensity and frequency of these emotions, so I think that is why I’m having a hard time.

I consider myself an introvert and enjoy my alone time. I like dreaming and having conversations with myself, in a healthy way of course. But, with my family and I all home bound in a small space (800 square feet), it’s hard to be alone. My bedroom has an open ceiling that allows light and sound to come in from the living room. Even when I head to my bedroom for “alone” time, I never feel alone. I find myself “hanging out with the family” doing things they like to do and get irritated because I am not doing what I like. The combination of boredom and irritation doesn’t prove to be a good fit for me, as my family has told me stop complaining more than once.

I realize there are many people alone at home and have limited social interactions. They are also struggling financially, due to a loss of work or income. This lead me to feeling guilt. I have people to support and spend the day with. We have money to buy food and pay bills. It’s silly to complain when so many people are struggling far more than myself.

There are other emotions as well. Sadness (missing close friends and family), fear (not knowing what could happen next), worry ( if I or someone I know will become ill), and confusion ( not knowing what I should be doing). These emotions feel strong and are difficult at times to navigate.

My family and I went for a drive yesterday evening. We drove by a local beach where we could see the ocean shore. Due to COVID-19, all the beaches in our area are closed, so we could only view the water from a distance. As I looked onto the vacant beach, a sense of calm came over me. I realized waves are only difficult when then appear large and overwhelming, but calming most of the time. It was a good reminder that this situation won’t always feel this way. The emotions will pass and calming rhythms will form. We will all find a way through this difficult time, even when our emotions make us think otherwise.

The Case of Three Moms

A conversation between a mother and a son.

“Hi Mom. Is that all you are going to wear from now on?” – Little Boy

“What do you mean? What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” – Mother. Mother looks at herself.

“I miss you being the other moms. You used to wear different clothing everyday. You looked different.” – Little Boy

“Other moms? What other moms? What are you talking about?” – Mother

“Well, you used to be Work Mom. You know, the mom who got ready in the morning, dropped me off at school, and went to work” – Little Boy

Work Mom

“Oh. I’m still Work Mom, but I don’t really get ready for work like I used to. What other moms are there?” – Mother

“Casual Mom. She is the mom who runs errands, hangs out with friends, and does things with Dad and I on the weekend” – Little Boy

Casual Mom

“I miss Casual Mom. We aren’t able to leave the house because we are housebound. Is that it? Is there another Mom I should know about?” – Mother

“Yeah. The Mom we get to see all the time now, Bum-Around-the-House Mom. She wears a pajamas and a robe most of the day and sometimes puts on some sweats when it’s time for dinner”. – Little Boy

Bum Around the House Mom

“I didn’t realize you liked the other Moms so much. I suppose I could change into Casual Mom for today. However, if Casual Mom returns maybe you could bring back Casual Son, instead of Bum Around the House Son.” – Mother

Mother winks at son and walks away.

Sink In

Last week was a long one. I know I’m not the only one who felt this way. The family and I started the second week of our home isolation to help “flatten the curve” for the spread of COVID-19. My husband, young son and I spent our days at home; working, eating, cooking, and somehow managing. Our older boys, ages 21 and 23, are in their homes about an hour north of us. At one point, we considered having the older boys move back home with us, but frankly we don’t have enough room. We’re renting a small condo, which is fine for the three of us, but we didn’t feel we could manage having two additional adults in our small place. So far, the older boys seem to handling things, but there have been a few emotional moments.

About four weeks ago, one of my former staff members in Italy told me that the US Naval Base, where I had worked at a few years ago, had closed down. As a matter of fact, all of Italy had closed down. The COVID-19 situation in Italy had taken a dramatic turn for the worse and the Italian government decided the best course of action was to close the country down to reduce the spread of the disease. I’d been following the coronovirus situation as it developed in China, Japan, Korea, and Iran, but when the news began about how Italy has been affected, that was when the seriousness really began to sink in.

I envisioned the Navy Base where I worked and how buildings couldn’t be accessed. I thought of the many sights seen during my travels in Italy that were not longer able to visited; places like Rome, Venice, Florence and Capri. Italy is a favorite destination for many people and now no one was able to visit. More importantly though, it was the daily reports of the lives lost to COVID-19 that impacted me the most. Around the world the numbers of deaths to the virus were staggering and still are. In a matter of four weeks, everyone has been impacted by the virus.

As the news of the virus moving to the United States began, my family and I started to make decisions. We canceled our spring break trip to Canada and I researched what could happen to the preschool I manage, if we needed to close. I read the news to see what other local schools were doing with school closures. Eventually, California Governor Newsom mandated all Californian’s to stay home except for essential purposes. He stated the next eight weeks would be crucial to reduce the spread of the virus.

My husband’s boss instructed him to work from home. My youngest son’s school told us they were closing his school and doing online learning. I made the difficult decision to close my preschool for a minimum of eight weeks Closing the preschool would affect families who needed to work. The decision was made even more difficult, as I would not have work for my staff and they would have to go on unemployment. My staff work part-time with no benefits, so they don’t have the safeguards teachers working for a school district or government may have.

It’s been two weeks since I closed the preschool and I have been home. I work daily to support my staff or families who are uncertain of the preschool’s future. I grocery shop only once a week and cook our meals. I reach out to the big boys providing “motherly” advice on everything from eating at home, washing their sheets, and of course…washing their hands, several times a day.

I feel worn out. The emotions of COVID-19 have taken it’s toll. I feel concerned for the world in a way I never have been before. I’m concerned about people I’ve never met, as well as people I love. My family and I are doing all we can to stay safe and keep others safe, but I wonder…will it be enough?

I'm Back

Well, isn’t this surprising? I’m back to writing a blog post after a two year absence. If you are wondering why I stopped writing, it’s because I was working overseas for the US Government and writing a personal blog could have interfered with my work. However, fast forward three years and I am back home in the US.

My family and I enjoyed two years working overseas in Italy. I won’t say everything was perfect, but it was by far the most amazing learning experience we could have ever had. We were able to visit more than ten countries and twenty cities in Europe during our time in Italy. My job was challenging and not exactly what I expected, but I am grateful to have had the opportunity,

Years ago when I started writing my blog it was an outlet for the crazy life I was living, as a full time home parent with three boys. I shared thoughts, stories and of course my struggles. The boys are quite a big bigger now, but the stories and struggles continue.

Currently, the world is in a stand still as the cornovirus has taken over. My husband, youngest son and I are housebound, as the California Governor has mandated we stay home to prevent the spread of COVID-19. We are doing our part staying home to stay healthy and to keep others healthy as well. My husband and I both work full time, but my husband’s job has a better ability to work remotely. I, on the other hand, am a Director for a small preschool and the program is closed for the time being. With the children not attending the preschool and the fact that online learning isn’t the best option for preschoolers, I have a lot more time on my hand that I am used to.

I realized this week being home, I have three main interests (hobbies is more like it) in my life. I work, family and friends, and travel. Sadly, two of the three things I do the most in my life are not an option right now, and frankly I can’t fill my days only focused on my family. So this is why I started to write again. I’ve always had things to say, but not the energy to write things down. Now is a good time to share, reflect and most of all keep me busy so I don’t drive my family members crazier than I already do.

We are now reacquainted. I’m praying the world will slow down and heal. We may need to redefine the phrase “getting back to normal”, as I think after this year, things will never be the same. For now, I am looking forward to sharing with you and together we can rediscover each other.

Food, Glorious Food

When I first told people the family and I were moving to Italy, the response was always, “Lucky you”. The “luck” they referred to was more than the access to the Italian landscapes, or being able to view the historic sights of Rome.   What many people consider the best part of living in Italy is the chance to eat the wonderful Italian food.  And yes, the food is wonderful.

In Italy, food is the heart of the family and the Italian culture.  If you are fortunate enough to be invited to an Italian family’s home for dinner you will see first hand how food is used as a means for connection.  An Italian meal is carefully prepared, and thoughtfully served.  The meal often lasts for hours, and saying you are full isn’t really an option, as food continues to be brought to you long after you’ve reached your limit.

During our travels in Europe, we’ve had the opportunity to experience great local food from each location we have visited.  Here’s photo essay of some of the great foods we’ve experienced so far.  Buon appetitio!

A Year In the Life

A year ago I began a new life.  Actually, it’s the same life, but in a new location.  My family and I moved to Italy to live and work for three years.  The decision to live overseas had been a dream of mine for a long time.  And last year I was granted the opportunity to fulfill my dream.

I haven’t written a post in a long while, as I felt it best to adjust to my new surroundings and support my family.  To be honest, I also wanted to wait until the newness of my new environment settled so I could provide a more objective view of what life has been like for the last year.

Moving to a new location can be a challenge.  For those who are middle-aged it is can be even more of a challenge.  By middle age, you have settled into your life and location. You have had the same job and friends for years, and for the most part like it that way. But some people in middle age question themselves, “Is this all there is?” and “What do I want for my life?”  Obviously, I was part of the latter group.  Several years prior to getting my job overseas, I began thinking of what it would be like and how I could make the dream of mine happen.

The last year has been one of highs and lows.  Obviously, the high points have been to travel and experience amazing places.  Our travels this year alone have surpassed any hopes I ever had about traveling.  One of the greatest advantages of living overseas is the access to travel.  Europe is vast, interesting and less expensive to visit when you live in a European county.  Because we are only living in Italy for three years, we feel compelled to travel as much as possible.   We spend hours looking at websites, formulating trips, and planning adventures.  Each county we visit offers a new experience with food, culture, history, and people.  The best part of living in Europe is being part of an amazing culture that is vast and diverse.

However, as high as the travels are for living in Europe, there are also some low points.   Working overseas is not the same as traveling overseas.  I have a job, and most of my time is spent working, not roaming the hills of Tuscany drinking wine.  My friends and family view our photos, and convince themselves I do nothing other than eat wonderful food and see amazing sights.  Of course this isn’t true.  The work I do is stressful.  As a matter of fact, this job is most stressful job I’ve ever had.  The hours are long and packed with things to do.  The newness of job is beginning to settle, so I’m hopeful the stress will lessen for the second year.  Although we have a lovely Italian home, it’s far away from my job.  My daily commute is over 1 1/2 hours a day.  If I do take a shorter route, the traffic is stressful, comparable to LA traffic.  Those of your know LA traffic know how crazy it must be.  Often on the weekend, my husband, son and I sit around resting and recuperating from our long week.   However, we make sure to take an outing at least one day each weekend, because we know we won’t be here forever.  Time limits make us do more than we normally would do.

The lowest part of living and working overseas is to be far away from loved ones.  We miss our family and friends, especially our two older boys.  Both boys were able to visit us this summer, but when the summer ended so did their visit.  Last year my middle son lived with our friends to complete his senior year.  We were fortunate to have the support for him while we were away, but realized parenting from afar isn’t easy.  Your child isn’t in your home, and you don’t have a physical presence to ensure things are getting done or rules are being followed.   Due to our location, we weren’t able to be back in the states for the start of college for both older boys this fall.  A mixture of guilt and sadness exists for my husband and I, as we have always been involved parents and to not be there to support them both feels strange.  Several situations have happened in the last year with both boys, and we’ve only been able to provide support via phone, or chat.  This is normal for all college bound parents, however our situation is more of a challenge due to the time difference.

Another low point has been the adjustment to our new situation.  My husband and young son have been slow to adjust to living in Italy. They are both doing better now, but it hasn’t been easy.  They’ve had to adjust to a new culture to live and work in.  My son went from attending a progressive school to a traditional one.  He has had to make new friends, and adjust to a life he would have not chosen for himself.   Knowing my family wasn’t happy has made me feel sad, as I know I’m the one responsible for the choice to live overseas.

So what do I think about this new life experience so far?  Frankly,  it’s the most amazing thing I’ve ever done.  I’ve never thought of myself as being brave, but I do now.  The challenges I have faced this year have surpassed anything I’ve done previously.  I’ve realized my family and I are quite capable.  We have developed skills of resilience and patience.  We’ve learned new ways to communicate and to support each other.  We’ve all gone way outside our comfort zone and survived.  This opportunity my family and I have is a chance of a lifetime.  There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t say that to myself, despite all of the challenges.

I am grateful for the support my family has provided each day for my work, and for reminding where my roots are.  The roots of your life are what keep you stable when the winds are strong, or the rain weaken the ground.  And let me tell you, there have been some strong winds and rain in Italy.

Hopefully, this post will get me on track again to writing for my blog.  I know many of you have asked me to start writing again.  I will do my best.  In the meanwhile, enjoy some photos of our first year living abroad.  Ciao!

Adjustable

It’s been nine weeks since I arrived in Italy.  There isn’t a day that goes by when I don’t say to myself, “I can’t believe I’m here.” Nine weeks ago I was living in the United States surrounded by all the things I’ve been familiar with for the last 25 years.  Now I am surrounded by the unfamiliar.

The best way to describe what I’ve been going through is to imagine you are tailor.  You love being a tailor and are good at it.  Some one calls and asks if would consider opening a clothing store using designs you’ve created.  You’re excited.  You’ll have an opportunity to showcase your talents and do what you love on a grander scale.  The person tells you the store will open in Italy.  Even better, right?  But there’s a catch.  You’ll need to leave your family behind and live alone in Italy for three months.  For the first three months you will not be doing sewing or design creation.  Instead you’ll be locating a place for your new store, working with legal issues, purchasing equipment, hiring staff…you get the idea.  Your excitement becomes clouded with reality.

I think one the reasons most people don’t pursue dreams is because of the adjustment period.  Adjusting from the known to the unknown is scary, unsettling and at times painful.  I’ve shed many tears since my arrival.  The circumstances I’ve had to deal with have been far from ordinary.  Yesterday I was expected for an appointment to visit a local school.  Feeling confident, I decided to meet my staff at the location instead of driving with her.   Mind you I’ve only been driving in Italy for a week.  I pulled out my GPS and headed on my way to the location.  As I pulled up to the destination I realized something was wrong.  There wasn’t a school in sight.  I called for directions, but it didn’t help.  I drove around searching desperately for the school to no avail.  Finally I called to say I wouldn’t make the appointment.  I drove back home feeling defeated.

Many times I’ve felt sure of a situation only to have it not work out.  This happens to everyone, but when you are out of your element it happens a lot more.  If I had gotten lost at home I would have called my husband, but here I had to figure it out on my own.  I didn’t realize how dependent I had become on the support of my family and friends until I was no longer with them.

Although the struggles have been real it doesn’t mean I would change the decision to move here.  Each day when I overcome a difficult situation I become more confident. When I try something new or different I become braver.  Every time I accomplish a task I didn’t think I could do, I realize I’m much more capable than I thought.  It’s a good thing. It’s a crazy, amazing, ridiculous, and wonderful adventure.  I’m proving I’m adjustable to a new life.  I’m proving working for a dream can be hard, but living a dream can be worth it.

 

 

 

37 1/2 Questions

Recently, while searching for a new exercise video on YouTube, I stumbled upon a video series called 73 Questions.  73 Questions are videos, filmed in a single shot, of personalities (mainly celebrities), asking 73 questions about what they like, hate, and know.  They make the videos appear random, like someone happened to stop by and do an impromptu interview, and ask a few questions.  However, the videos are obviously scripted and practiced.  They are still fun to watch.  I started with Nicole Kidman (her Australian house is amazing), and ended with James Corden.  Check them out for yourself here.

I thought it would be fun for me do something similar for my blog.  However, I have no interest in doing the video portion of the interview or for 73 questions.  I decided to create a list of 37 1/2  questions I’ve been asked regarding my upcoming move to Italy.   Since announcing my decision to move with the family, I have been bombarded with tons  of questions.

Here we go.

1) How did this happen?

I’m not sure I understand the question.  How did what happen?

2) How did you decide to move to Italy?

Oh.  I accepted a job to work over there.

3) No.  I mean…how did you even think of applying for a job in Italy?

Well, 20 plus years ago I worked overseas in London, England.  It was a great experience,and I’ve always wanted to live overseas again.

4)  Did you talk about applying for the job with your family?

Of course.

5)  How did they respond?

Indifferent at first.  They knew it was my dream to live overseas, but didn’t think it wouldn’t really happen.

6) Were they surprised to hear you got the job?

Yes and no.  I’d been talking about applying for jobs for a while, but the fact I got a job offer was a surprise.

7)  How did your family react?

Mixed.  Husband was proud, excited, but nervous.  Older boys were fine, as long as they could stay at their current schools.  Little Boy cried.

8)  Was it hard to have Little Boy cry?

Yes.  Before I accepted the job, we had several family discussions.  There were a lot of questions, and emotions during those conversations.

9)  Is Little Boy still sad?

I’m sure he is, but he also is excited.  We all are.  

10)  What’s the hardest part about making decision to live overseas?

Making sure everyone needs are being met.  Years ago, when I lived overseas I was a single person. Now I am married, with three kids, own a home, and have aging parents.  Making sure we had a plan how to make it work was crucial prior to accepting the job.

11)  What work will you be doing?

I will be the Director of Child Youth programs on an US Military base.

12)  Will you live on the US base?

No.

13)  Do you speak Italian?

No.

14)  Have you been to Italy?

No.

15)  Is everyone moving to Italy with you?

No.  My husband and youngest son are coming with me, but two older boys will remain in the United States.  They want to finish high school and college in the US.

16)  Did you offer for them to come with you to Italy?

Of course.  The older boys have friends, and connections in the US.  They are also ages 18 and 20. They are old enough to decide what they want to do for the future.

17)  Are you sad to leave them?

Yes.  It’s hard to think about,  but they will visit and they will stay with us during vacations and summer.  We are a close family.  We will make sure to stay connected.

18)  How long will you live overseas?

Three years.

19)  Can you stay longer?

Possibly.  It depends on a lot of factors.

20)  Is your husband supportive?

Yes, very.

21)  Was he always supportive?

Yes and no.  At first, we didn’t have all the details worked out.  It was a complex process to see how we could support three boys, three schools, own a home, and two careers.  I’m the dreamer in the family.  He’s the practical one.  His practical side needed to be fulfilled, prior to accepting the job.

22)  What has been the response from family and friends?

Mixed.  Sad, excited, shocked, and happy.  We feel all the same emotions.

23)  What has been the most unusual response to the move?

Silence.  

23)  What will you miss the most when you move?

The people.

24)  What will you miss the least?

Nothing.  I love where I live, my family and my friends. 

25)  Why leave then?

Five years ago my husband and I talked about our future.  We both love to travel, and both want meaningful careers.  This job opportunity offers us both things.  Leaving doesn’t always mean you are unhappy.  Sometimes we leave to experience something more.

26)  What will happen to your house?

We will rent it out.

27)  What about all your belongings?

We will take most of our things with us, and store the rest.

28)  Are you scared?

No.

29)  Really?

Yes, really.  I have concerns, but scared…no.

30)  I’ve never heard of someone taking a job overseas.  Isn’t it unusual?

Not really.  Military families move overseas all the time.  This experience has given me great appreciation for US military families who move frequently and to overseas locations. The process is daunting when you have a family.  

31)  Do you like Italian food?

Is this a real question?

32)  Do you worry about crime in Italy?

Not more than I do in the US.

33)  What happens if you get homesick?

It will happen.  We will get homesick, but we will support each other.  This move is different from my previous one.  There are many more ways to stay connected.  We will also travel back to the US at least once a year.

34)  What would you say to someone considering working overseas or following a dream?

Do the research.  It was not an easy process for this to happen.  Take time to research how it can happen, and begin the process.  If you really see something in your future, you have to take the steps to make if happen.  

35)  Anything else?

Stay positive.  Many times I’ve been discouraged because things didn’t go as quickly, or as smoothly as I wanted.  Surround yourself with positive people who support you.  You will need their encouragement.

36)  Regrets?

No, not yet.

37)  Final words?

I’m grateful for this opportunity.  It’s happening because of many people who believe in and support me.  Timing and luck had a lot to do with it too.  I get to do valuable, meaningful work, see the world, and be with my family.  It doesn’t get much better than that.

371/2 )  And?

Ciao.  We’re done.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Role Reversal

Last week I went home to visit/care for my father while my sister was out-of-town.  I stayed at her home, and cared for her cats, and spent my days visiting my dad.  With the move to Italy less than 8 weeks away, visiting my father was something I wanted to do before I leave.

Almost two years ago my father’s health began to decline.  He developed kidney failure. Instead of dealing with the health issue in its early stages, my father waited until his kidneys began to fail completely before seeking medical attention.  Since the onset of kidney failure, my father has slowly transformed into a different person.

My father has always been strong-willed.  He is the oldest of five children.  When he was 20 years old his father (my grandfather) passed away, leaving my dad as the patriarch of his family.  My father, being the responsible person he is, took the role seriously and helped his mother to care for his younger siblings.  Because he had so much responsibility, at such a young age, my father developed a strong sense of independence.  He has always been the kind of person who liked to do things for himself, and  his own way.

When my father’s health began to decline it was a difficult transition for him.  Kidney failure causes a variety of symptoms, but one that affected my father the most was a lack of energy and strength.  My father has always been active, and when he became ill he no longer was able to walk or stand  for any length of time.

At first my father refused to acknowledge his illness.  He was determined to maintain his independence.  I’m sure he knew how serious his illness was for quite a while before my siblings and I became aware of it.   However, by the time we did become aware, his disease had progressed too far.  There was little left to do except start dialysis to do the work his kidneys no long could.

One thing everyone can relate to is having to deal with aging parents.  Not everyone has children, but everyone has parents.  My mother passed away over 20 years ago suddenly. There was no time for lengthy goodbyes, or closure.  Her death was abrupt and painful. Yet, watching a parent slowly age is also difficult.  To see the person who once guided you with strength, no longer be able to walk or have difficulty eating is also painful.  The tasks your parents once did for you as a young child become the tasks you now do for them as an adult.  In essence, your roles become reversed.

To watch my father’s health, both physically and mentally, decline has been trans-formative for me in many ways.  Although it makes me sad at times, I am grateful to have had the opportunity to spend with him.  Over time, he has lessened his strong stance on issues, and is kind and gracious.  When I would arrive each day to visit him I would do care taking things. Sometimes I would clean his room or help his with his meals.  They were the kind of things I do for my boys.

Leaving my father at the end of my trip was hard.  Because I will be leaving soon, and moving so far away, there is a chance I won’t see him again.  I told him about my upcoming move with the family, but the next day he had forgotten all about it.  I leave my father in the hands of my loving, devoted sister, who tirelessly oversees his care.  A mix of sadness, and guilt overcomes me when I think about not seeing him again.

On the day of my final visit my father, his wife and I shared a meal in their apartment.  We had planned to go to the dining hall, but my father wasn’t feeling well after dialysis, so decided to eat at home.  During our meal, there were a couple of times his glasses slipped down his nose, and I gently pushed them back up.  I remember thinking how my father would have never allowed my to do something like push his glasses up as  child. He would have pushed my hand away claiming he could do it himself.  But, my father let me help him.  He allowed me the chance to show him love in a way he used to do for me as a child. Our role reversal was okay for him and for me…and we were both grateful.

 

 

 

Hmm…

Hmm…where to begin.  It’s been quite a while since I’ve written a blog post.  A few months ago when I was asked to renew my blog subscription, I questioned if I wanted to continue.  As I debated in my mind, I realized I did have more things to share and maybe another year of blogging would be a good thing.

Since I began my blog five years ago a lot has happened.  Creating the blog initially was an outlet for me to express my thoughts and feelings regarding midlife, motherhood and my transition from full-time home parent back to the workforce.  Well, I’m happy to say I made it through my “midlife something”, and am now fully immersed in my career.

For the last few years I have gone back to school to update my education, and have worked various jobs to update for resume and job related skills.  My plan worked, as I recently accepted a position that fully utilizes all the information I’ve learned, and has an unexpected bonus.  The job is located overseas in Italy.  It’s hard to believe, but my family and I will be moving over to Italy by the end of the year.

When I think back to where I was five years ago, I realize there were many things I needed to learn before accepting my current employment.  Originally, my blog was created as a result of not getting a job.  After not being selected, I knew I had work to do.  So I got busy. I went to school, started working, and began the process of getting up to speed in my career field.  It wasn’t easy. As a matter of fact, the last few years have been the most challenging times I have ever endured career-wise.  I’ve made many mistakes, but I’ve also taken some amazing risks. I’ve gone out of my comfort zone so many times that I no longer fear things I’ve never done before.  So much so, that I took a chance to apply for jobs that were only dreams for me.

What lies ahead for me is more challenges, but not the fear and doubt I once had.  Years ago I searched for my purpose, my meaning, my contribution to the world outside of being a wife and mother.  It took a while, but I found it.  I hope to use all my life experience to make a difference in children’s lives.

As I embark on an exciting adventure to Italy to live and work, I want to be able to share my experience.  I thought about changing the name of my blog several times to reflect the new direction of my life.  I still may do that in the future.  However, for now my three boys are home for the summer…eating, making messes, and lying around the house making me crazy.  My blog name seems the best fit my life right now.

Arrivederci, my friends.